At night, my mind fills with strange thoughts. Thoughts that mainly revolve around what exactly am I doing with my life. Do I matter. Is it all worth it. And all and all, it comes down to the same answer.
No.
I want to matter to some people. I want people to actually enjoy being around me. I want to be invited to dinner with people who call me their friends, I want to actually hang out with the people who say they're my friends.
But they never do. They all just go about their lives and hang out with people who they are friendlier with than with me. The only way people actually invite me is if I tell them I would like to come, which is kind of rude, I think. Otherwise, I'm just a blip on the far corner of their radar screen.
I want people to actually like me. But they never will.
So fuck you all. I hate this. I hate it all. I hate the night but it's all I'm good for. I hate your alcohol but it's all anyone wants. I just hate this place.
Whatever. No one reads this. Fuck off.
No comments:
Post a Comment